Victim mentality is, in fact, a perfectly natural and automatic human development. Understanding how and why it develops is the key to freeing yourself from it, permanently.
Living life from a victim mentality means seeing yourself at the mercy of people, circumstances, and events outside of you. It’s living life from a helpless, disempowered standpoint, and counting on the actions of others to change the issues and challenges you are facing.
For some, living from a victim mentality is part of their constant experience; for others, the state of victim mentality may come and go — depending on their current…
Whatever happened to you, or around you, during 2020, here are five things you can do to make sure that 2021 is better.
We tend to think of our emotions as separate from our work and finances, and beyond our control. The truth is: The chemical reactions that cause emotions have a powerful physical impact on the brain — which, in turn, affects more than how we feel; it affects our perception, judgement, risk-assessment, decision-making, choices, problem-solving, and other practical brain functions.
Whenever you’re feeling any negative emotion, your brain and body are in a level of the emergency fight-freeze-flight state.
As part of this stress state, blood drains from the prefrontal cortex of your brain — where you do your cognitive thinking.
If either of your parents used “the silent treatment” when they weren’t pleased with you — it may be impacting your adult life in ways you are completely unaware of. Parents withholding attention, ignoring their children, or shutting their child out of their company — is a common coping skill; and it seems harmless. But the hidden long-term damage can completely change the adult that child becomes. The great news is — the damage can be changed!
The silent treatment is an apparently harmless alternative to other, harsher punishments, but when we look a little deeper, the effects can be…
We were already dealing with daily challenges, before 2020 started. Now, the changes to our daily lives have upped the anti in dealing with stress and emotional triggers. Here’s how to take charge of how your day goes — regardless of what challenges you’re dealing with or what’s happening in the world around you.
Whatever challenges you’re facing, right now, these simple little adjustments can completely shift how your day goes.
When you go to bed, tonight, set your intention of what you’re going to think about as soon as you’re aware you’re awake in the morning. …
I just saw a post shared, on Facebook, that says “Why we acted right, back in the day — ‘The Belt on the Shelf’” — it’s a comic meme, but I wanted to share some important information about its message.
Many years ago, in a conversation about disciplining children, someone said: “Well, I was spanked, and there’s nothing wrong with me!”
My response to that person was: “Are you as happy as you want to be? Are your relationships loving, fulfilling, fun, and secure? Do you enjoy life? Are you happy with your finances? Are you healthy, and happy with…
The opposite of selfishness is not: altruism, generosity, or compassion for others. The opposite of selfishness is not: caring about others or putting others first. Selfishness does not come from being too focused on the self. Selfishness comes from the natural, human survival instinct — in response to not knowing how to give ourselves what we need and want, to feel safe.
Although love, kindness, compassion, and connection with others, is a key part of who we are, as humans — and how we’ve been able to survive — it is not our strongest instinct.
Our strongest instinct is survival…
If Time Line Therapy hasn’t worked for you, this may be the reason.
While both methods of creating positive results in all areas of life achieve those changes by addressing negative experiences in the past, there are key differences.
The fact that past experiences provide the automatic references for current experiences is common in both modalities. However, advances in neuroscience have changed some major aspects of Time Line Therapy®.
Both Time Line Therapy and The Remmert Method™ recognize that, from birth, each new experience is filtered through the information from previous experiences — and that determines our emotional response to…
Unless your life is in immediate danger, and you need to fight, run away, or pretend to be dead, fear is not only unnecessary, it’s a hindrance.
During this time of global upheaval, it’s been pointed out that those who aren’t following the guidelines of masks and social distancing aren’t frightened enough of the consequences. It appears, to many, that fear is necessary, in order to get those who are protesting safety measures, to realize the danger and then comply. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Those who are protesting, those who are objecting, those who don’t believe…
Oprah Winfrey tweeted this, on April 10th: “One of my concerns during this pandemic is wondering how we can get through this and not let it become one of the most traumatic experiences of our lives. I thought having a conversation with one of the world’s leading trauma experts, Dr. Bruce Perry, could be helpful to us.”
While Dr. Perry and Oprah both shared some powerful advice in that conversation, I’d like to share a little about what makes the deeper difference between whether this turns out to be a traumatic experience or not, for each individual.
Two people can…
Ex-struggler, mind-set coach, writer, brain enthusiast, and effervescent cheerleader of those who choose to find ways to improve themselves and their lives.